There are days where I feel like I’ve got it all together. My day went well and the kids were working together. The house got cleaned and dinner was cooked. Maybe even a friendly phone call or text was sent.

Then there are the rest of the days. My bad days, my human days, my reality checks. Days that seem to fall apart shortly after my alarm clock goes off. Kids won’t stop bickering, no work has gotten done. It’s five o’clock and I still haven’t figured out dinner. My temper blew and my patience took the day off. Everything I seem to say comes out completely wrong.

It’s easy for me to become so discouraged on days like those because all I want to be in life is a great mother and a good friend. I care about people and the world and yet on those days that could seem farthest from the truth.

This is how I see it…

It’s as if I am covering myself in plaster, layer after layer, day after day; the plaster represents everything that I feel is wrong with me.
I ask God for healing, for a breakthrough, and He chisels. We don’t see it as a physical chunk falling off of us but somewhere in our daily lives, we take a hit. Something has popped up, giving us a chance to react differently, to make better decisions, to be the person we see God intends for us to become. But it hurts, we fail, we miss the mark. Another layer of plaster added.

We beg and plea with God for a “revival”, for something to change. What we really seem to be asking for without fully realizing it is for Him to magically change us. We want to wake up a better mother, a kinder spouse, a friend who listens more, an employee who goes above and beyond. We want the work to be done by the time we’ve finished praying.

We do need a breakthrough but it’s not going to come in the form of the Red Sea splitting before us or manna falling at our feet.
It’ll be more like the years of hard labor Noah had to put into the arc in order to protect his family. Years of slow process and possibly people mocking you for something they cannot see yet.

It may not take years but it could. It could take even longer for the days we choose to stop and give up. The days we choose to see the hard work in front of us instead of the promise God put within us.
We look at what hurts us right now instead of how our work can one day positively affect our lives and the lives of our children.

There are so many suffocating days where all I want to do is hulk through all the plaster!
I need God to break through my negative thinking, my irrational fears, my bad temper, my pent-up emotions, my dysfunctional routines.
I want Him to snap His fingers and do what only He can. I want a miracle.


The miracle, for us, (unless God wills something else) looks like hard work, looks like learning to put up room walls for each animal. It’s long days of sanding, priming, and sealing wood we had to chop down ourselves.

The breakthrough comes when we give our day to God every time we wake up and trust Him to work it out for good. Smile when we want to tell someone off, pray when we want to doubt, call someone when we need encouragement and encourage them. Breakthroughs happen when our faith is in action.

Strongholds are never too late to break out of. Our minds can be renewed daily but only when we trust His promise. Our strength comes from Him, therefore, we have the power within us to reach down and grab onto the call He placed on our lives.

We are already the people we need to be, we just don’t have enough faith to walk that out yet.

Wow, let’s think about that for a minute. We are already the person God has made us out to be. When He looks at us He sees our potential, our new (in Him) selves. The only thing that is stopping us is TRUSTING He has given us the authority to carry out that purpose and FEAR of letting go of everything that we have grown comfortable to.

Fear of letting go and doubt He’ll catch us on the way down.

What does trusting Him look like for us?

Patience: I already have the ability to withstand the little things that drive my patience short because God has given me access to His peace. However, I am refusing to use His peace once I react on my impatience.

Gossip: We have the opportunity to spread the news about Gods love and mercy and we let go of the opportunity to show others God through us the moment we join them in negative conversation.

Rudeness: We have the ability to keep our mouths shut and allow God to be our vindicator in His timing but we relinquish that the moment we take matters into our own hands and say something that is not edifying.

Negative Self-Talk: We are wonderfully made by God Himself who happens to love us in a way that we can’t even fathom (and maybe that’s why it’s so easy for us to forget this one because our love is always conditional but His never is).

He looks at us and sees greatness and beautiful colors. We look at ourselves and see what the world(society) has told us is wrong with us. We’re dumb, ugly, fat, tomboyish, loud, etc. God knows you, the deep inner you that even you have a hard time figuring out and yet He still looks at you in love! That is an amazing kind of love.

It’s ok to encourage ourselves when we feel we are beginning to fall into the trap of negative self-talk. That is a great reason to memorize some verses(promises) of the Bible that you feel will help you in this season.


God is more understanding than we’ll ever be and He is willing to help us in this life every step of the way if we invite Him to. That is where the breakthrough happens. Inviting God into your mind, your job, your family life, your marriage, your confusion, your questions, in your loneliness, in your pain, in your mistakes. Make Him a part of your daily life, of your every thought and decision.

He is working in your life, all you need to do is TRUST Him and know that He is working ALL THINGS out for good.

   God is right there with you, tune in.

We all fall short of Gods grace. Which is just a fancy way of saying none of us deserve Gods goodness. But we get it, anew, every single day. What are some ways you try to break out of your old self and try to stay focus on Gods promise for your life?


It’s Ok To Not Be Ok

How many times have found yourself at the end of your rope? Realizing that everything seems to be caving in all at the same time? Troubles from just about every angle show up and you just don’t feel equipt for the task. It’s time to go to church and you try to find any reason in the book not to go because, well, life.

But somehow you’re there.

You find yourself at church and suddenly your heart feels heavier than ever.

Instead of running to the altar and crying out to the Lord you’re sitting at the back of the room quietly crying, trying your best to remain out-of-sight? You don’t want to draw attention to your weariness. No one needs to see just how broken you’re feeling. Your life, your problems, right?

The thing is, even though you feel broken. Even though you feel like giving up. Even though you don’t even know how you managed to make it to church, you’re there. You made it because even in your brokenness your heart was receptive enough to the Lord’s direction.


And even if no one around you notices you, or no one cares to see your pain God does,  He is the only one whose opinion of us matters, and He loves us. He feels our pain. He hears our hearts crying out in our weakness. He sees all that we’ve been through and He knows our tanks are empty.

When we decide to show up, we find that God has already been waiting for us.

He has our backs. He is our strength. He is the only one who can truly help us through whatever storm we face. We expect so much from the people around us. We expect them to care. We expect them to help. We expect a lot. Yet for some odd reason, we usually expect God to leave us hanging when He is the only one who can meet us exactly where we are.

So I don’t care if you see me crying. I don’t care if you think something negative about me in my moments of weakness. Just because I breakdown does not mean I have fallen. I am human! I hurt. I feel. I get overwhelmed. I grow weary.


I’ve come to refuel. I need God to take my load and fill my spirit and so I’m here. I’m crying, I’m broken and I’m at my Father’s house expecting healing, expecting a breakthrough, expecting Him to breathe life into my heart once again.

I’m weak and I’m still learning so much about what it means to walk through life completely relying on Him. But He is my strength. He sees my heart and He has me in His hands.

So to all those looking at someone in church losing her cool.
Let her.
She’s kept it together long enough.

She showed up, give her a hand. 👏

   I am praying for everyone out there who needs a little grace. Anyone who is struggling through something they don’t see an outcome for. I want to remind you that the God we serve is capable of things we can’t even begin to imagine. So believe He can and don’t be afraid to ask Him for help.